Currently finding: rest
Currently excited about: the purchase of my new camera
Currently sick over: the money it took to purchase my new camera
This year we did things differently. We did "Christmas" on Christmas Eve. It's before midnight and I am already done with Christmas. This is weird. But you know, this was one of our best times as a family. We all came out of it refreshed and not too annoyed. Score. We didn't do gifts this year, just for the little ones. But we still eat just as much food and sat around doing nothing. It's like illegal to do anything productive during the holidays. Every time I thought to do something that I could check off my to-do list, I stopped myself. And I just sat there. That's all you can really do, right? I mean some families play games and such. We just sit there. But I have this newly purchased camera to walk around with, taking candid pictures that annoy people. This was an unplanned purchase which is why my stomach hurts to think about spending the money. I sat on my other one. Broke the dang screen. Anyway, it's a great camera and I am sure it will do me good in DC. So many things to document.
We are a family tied to tradition and Christmas hilights these traditions. As time passes and the family grows and changes, we have to let go of some....all awhile, adapting new ones. And what I see in my family at every Christmas is that we have remained steady, hanging onto the traditions which mean so much and letting the others go. We still dress up and act out the story of baby Jesus....singing Happy Birthday to Jesus with angel food cake and 3 candles that represent the Father, Son and Holy Spirit.....we eat Pizzelles....we open one gift at a time. I love these things. Today I think about my grandma. She was the source of these traditions we follow. And although they have evolved and changed, as they should and have to, they keep the same heart. And I think it's beautiful. And now, we look forward to a new addition to our family next Christmas. My sister is having a long awaited baby. Next year, that baby will be with us. A new Christmas.
And I look back last Christmas Eve to my blog post, and I am able to see what I was feeling, anticipating this time, when I would be done with school, wondering what that would feel like....having the whole world in front of me. And yet, it's not as overwhelming as I imagined it to be. Because just like every other time in your life, you are always more prepared than you thought. God somehow, in the craziness of life, orchestrates you to be ready for the exact thing which he is leading you to. And getting ready for DC, with new relationships and experiences, feelings, challenges, I feel such hope. JOY. And so many other things...It's remarkable.
It feels like a new Christmas.... I am in a new state of mind, entering a new place as I watch my family beginning a new phase, getting ready for a new arrival. And with the white snow that will be covering the ground tomorrow when I awake, I can't help but be reminded that "He makes all things new" (Rev. 21:5).
Happy Birthday, Jesus....and thanks.
The Gifts of Grief
10 years ago
1 comment:
Currently listening to: Hide and Seek.
Girl, that always makes me think of you now. Which is a WONDERFUL thing, because I like thinking about you. It makes me smile. Real big.
Miss you.
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